I Kiss better than I cook

I have a sign in my kitchen hanging above my pantry that reads "I Kiss better than I cook". I am not offended by this sign at all. I actually had it custom made. When Mark first saw it hanging up he read it and said, "that is true".

If you know me, you know that I do not like to cook. The whole kitchen area is a drag to me. I can actually feel the walls and ceiling closing in on me when I step in there. The lights dim, the air is stuffy and anxiety takes control of my mind and body. To add to my problem, I am a mother and wife, so I spend about 90% of my day in the kitchen. I am also a clean freak. Another reason why preparing meals is so hard for me. So many dirty bowls, knives, cutting boards, pots, pans, spoons... Someone help! My brain hurts just thinking about it. It is hard for me to prepare a meal from start to finish without cleaning up after every step. Thus, my time in the "dungeon" is increased. To which cries from the galley come, "mom I'm hungry", "mom play with me", "mom how do I go to Lego.com". Oh the insanity!

For the last 8 years now, and counting, Mark's job has required him to travel on a weekly basis. This means that he leaves on Monday and comes home on Friday. So I as a wife and mother have only had to cook for myself and then children during the week. Then the "picky eating" stage sets in with the children, like all children and you have two choices. First choice is to continue to make a variety of meals and make your children eat them or else. The second choice is to cater to their whims, make what they will eat and have a nice dinner together. You with your food, them with theirs. I have chosen the latter. This decision has greatly added to my disagreement with the kitchen. When you cater, you don't get practice in the kitchen. I can cook. I just don't like to because it takes too much time.

I have chosen to cater, but secretly hope that some day my children will come around to trying and liking new things. I would like to offer a piece of advice. When you make a decision, don't secretly hope for it to go the other way. I will be working out the catering decision I made in therapy in the future I am sure. Or will I?

I present to you Alison eating Chicken Enchiladas! Not only did she eat an entire serving, she liked it! And had seconds!

Okay, so her face doesn't look like she likes it, but trust me, she does! She cleaned her plate except for the 2 pinto beans she refused to try. Baby steps.

Being the second child she looks up to her older brother. So she decided long ago to follow his eating habits. I have noticed over the last 6 months that she was growing tired of those same 4 things for dinner. In the last week she has tried and likes ham, potato cheese casserole, corned beef, carrots, enchiladas, tri tip, Italian cream cheese chicken, pork spare ribs and a few other things I can't remember. I have been making John take a bite as well. He compiles, but won't take more than a bite.

Could this be the beginning of the end of my disagreement with the kitchen? Too early to say just yet. Time will tell. As for now, I am accepting of the fact that I enjoy food. And I really enjoy food that has been prepared by someone else.